Boob Shopping 101

This post is dedicated to all you never knew you would someday know about boob shopping.

FIRST 1st, you have to have one or both of your real breasts removed by a certified medical Boob Remover aka Breast Surgeon. In my opinion, a clean slate is the best way to start!

SECOND 2nd- You will need a prescription written by your doctor if you wish anyone (insurance) to help you with the cost. Yes, that's right. Someone will have to say it is OK for you to have breasts. Because looking at your completely flat chest will NOT be enough evidence. LOL (Trust me- you will want their help! On average each form costs between $185 and $300. Like $360-$600 a set. Ouch! Mastectomy bras are between $25-$60 each). 

NEXT 3rd, Isn't there a saying of  "The more you know..."  I had done lots of research online. There is lots of information. It's actually a bit overwhelming. One good source is the American Cancer Society's TLC store website. They have an article about things you should know about Breast Replacement Forms. Another was an article from the BreastFree Blog. Who knew there were so many different things you could choose from? Here's a Fake Boob 101 crash course. 

* There are 3 basic shapes you have to choose from- the Triangle, the Asymmetrical, and the Teardrop. The purpose behind that is that each fills in a different part of the bra. 

* There are different backs to boobs. Some adhere to your skin, others that help with climate control and still others that are concave, or flat backed for a custom fit. 

* They are made of different materials. The most common is silicone because it has the most lifelike feel and most are waterproof. You have the choice between regular and lightweight silicone forms. But then you also have ones that even weigh less that are made of fabric, plastic and are filled foam, memory foam, or micro beads. And finally, they make Swim forms. They are usually clear and have a concave back to let the water flow easier.

* And for further information you may never need to know- prosthetic boobs come in numbers not letters. Guess they don't want you to forget that they are fake so they distinguish them differently. LOL

Cup	Band
AA	30	32	34	36	38	40	42
A		30	32	34	36	38	40	42	46	48
B			30	32	34	36	38	40	42	44	46	48
C					32	34	36	38	40	42	44	46	48	50
D						32	34	36	38	40	42	44	46	48	50	52
DD							32	34	36	38	40	42	44	46	48	50	52
DDD									34	36	38	40	42	44	46	48	50	52
G										32	34	36	38	40	42	44	46	48
H											32	34	36	38	40	42	44	46
FakeBoob Size	0	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11	12	13	14	15	16	17

Finally 4th, Time to go shopping! Believe it or not, there ARE Boob shops around. Here in Fargo, I visited two. The first was the American Cancer Society. The other was the Just for Women shop ran by Sanford Health. Both have their perks. Here's a little about my Boob Shopping experiences:

Shopping Day #1: 

A couple of weeks ago, KBro went with me to the American Cancer Society for my first Boob Shopping experience. After a mastectomy, the ACS will give you a free bra and breast form. [I'll take whatever free, I can get!] They have a closet full of fake boobs that they have had donated to them to give away (not necessarily sets but just random stuff). According to Kristen's professional boob-size opinion, we decided to start out small. The lady helping us got out several bras and a few different small sizes. In the picture I think I am modeling a 2 (on my left) and a 4 (on my right). We thought we were SO funny! Then the "professional opinion" changed directions and I quote, KBro said- "If you are going to get that size you might as well not wear any." LOL! Well, OK... then. So we asked for a couple larger sizes. And then... a size above that. Maybe one size larger? And... do you have these in a set? ;) Perhaps we were there a little too long and a little too picky because finally, the lady just gave us free range of the boob closet and went back to work. Wahoo! We searched the closet and finally found a set of size 6 Asymmetrical forms and a set of size 6 swim boobs that we liked. We also found 2 bras that fit them well. Look at us- We are awesome! We were trying to make a decision on which one to take and then decided to just ask if we could have both. [They were the only swim set in the closet] No harm in asking, right? The lady said we could take them all and off we went. Two sets of boobs and two bras, $0 paid-- I'm so excited!!!! A very successful day indeed. Thanks Kristen for coming with me! You are awesome!

Shopping Day #2:
Then this week, Brett went with me over to the Just for Women store run by Sanford. A totally different experience but fun just the same. The Sanford ladies don't leave you, they actually dress you. [Right after my surgery I stopped by the shop to get a post-surgical, front-clasp bra. That first time I was a little self-conscience but I've discovered that a Mastectomy is like childbirth- at some point modesty is not part of the equation. LOL] Just for Women has lots of different shapes and sizes. We tried on teardrop ones, asymmetrical ones, triangle ones, sticky back ones, small ones and large ones as well as several bras. With our insurance, Sanford will do 1 set of boobs and 4 bras every year. With the post surgery one, I had 3 bras left to choose. Brett liked the smooth look so we went with ones like that. Then the trick is that you have to match the bra cup size to the breast form you want. Believe me- a fake boob doesn't look good hanging out of the bra. ;) We finally decided on a triangular size 5 breast form with a cool comfort back. Yeah! Thanks Honey for helping me pick out the perfect chest! XOXO!

So after a couple very fun shopping experiences-- here's my many new boob looks. So fun!

All Natural- size 00, My Everyday Boobs- size 4,  My Swim Boobs- size 6 (more like size 5), My Date Boobs- size 6

Here's what my actual Prosthetic Boobs look like.

OK... Last thing. Because we ARE soooo funny, we had Jenise let us try on a size 12. She put me in an I bra. You know... like DoubleD, E, F, G, H, I. Holy Moly, big boobies, people!- They actually have some that go up to a 20. I can't even imagine! LOL My shirt obviously was NOT meant for that boob size (that is one attractive line across my chest!) but you get the idea! LOL For a "small, mature breasted" woman (at least that's what my doctors told me LOL)- these babies were gigantic. So funny!